early morning cram session for chemistry…. #ohwell it shouldn’t be that hard…
so he called me last night twice and i finally decided to pick up….he told me that we needed to talk and my heart dropped….i just KNEW he was going to tell me that he didnt want to be with me anymore….but when he came over, he started to take off his Jewelry and plugged his phone into my charger just like he always has when he’s planned on staying the night with me…..uh okay….i was a little confused cause if he wanted to break up with me…why on earth would he even consider being rude enough to put his shit all in my room……..so he grabbed one of my pillows and put it down next to me and laid down…i was just staring at him and he gave me a hug. he told me he loved me and told me not to cry…so he started talking and basically told me that he was never really confused about me and our relationship…he was confused on him and her friendship….he knew he did not want to leave me…he knows he doesnt…he said that i havent done anything but love him from day one and he has too….he was just confused by their friendship…they did used to like each other….and of course that feeling isnt going to go away as quickly as poeple think they will, but he said that he DOESNT want to be with her at all…he wants to be her friend and be there for her….he said that the hardest part about this whole situation is that he knows that she is going to eventually stop wanting to be his friend when me and him are together…and he is just scared of losing her as a friend…..and i told him…friends may come and go, but if you find someone who is truely and madly in love with you, would die for you, would cry for you, would risk their life for you, would give up everything for you……theyre not going ANYWHERE. at least IM NOT….so regardless of he loses ALL his friends, im still going to be there supporting him through the way and helping him through it…. why? because i LOVE him… i have for 6 months now and i dont plan on stop loving him… when he left last night, he actualyl went to go drive her to UNT so she could drop her cousin back over there and she could sleep on the way back…he said that he is only doing this because its the only along time he’s going to give her…and he needs to talk to her about all of this. he needs to explain everything to her….now i dont know how this conversation went…….but you know me….i sure as hell am gonna ask! i just hope and pray that he isnt even more confused about stuff after he talked to her……thats the LAST thing we need…..
Okay. so my boyfriend has not OFFICIALLY broken up with me…but it surely does feel like it…He told me yesterday morning that me and him need to separate because he feels like he needs to make a decision on who he wants to be with, me or this other girl that he used to like last semester…He actually told me that he made a mistake by asking me to be his girlfriend 3 months ago because he said that he was never really over his feelings for her…and he said that he never intentionally intended for us to really get as close as we are…but he is glad that we did because we ended up being really happy…at the time that we started dating, him and her wern’t friends…but a few weeks ago, he started talking to her again and they became close again and his feelings came back for her….now he is not talking to me about anything. Yesterday the girl messaged me on twitter and apologized for “ruining things” and i replied and talked to her….he found out that we had a conversation and he blew up on ME….not her, the person who started the entire conversation…he jumped on me and said i was in the wrong for saying anything…..anyway…he told me yesterday morning when he told me we needed space, that he wanted to make things right between us…he said that he would do anything to be with me and make things right between us again…but he is so mad and wont talk to me anymore…. so i really dont know what to do anymore…please help me…
all these old school songs keep me upset….i need to get up and try to make myself eat and do something productive…..im making myself sick by sitting here crying…
its all i need right now…..
Monday night RAW was amazing»» thank you @mr_sirhawkins :)
I’ve been off and on with sickness for so long…having the people i have in my life right now, has kept me strong.
day 24: random
day 22: #screenshot :’) my best friend. thank you so much @megansenior2012 i love and miss you so much.
good morning! watching Arthur lol #ohwell